Over the next few weeks colleges will be sending out letters, or more likely emails, telling students if they have been accepted into their college. We obviously hope that every student gets accepted into their first choice college, but the reality is that not everybody will. Here are some observations on how you can deal with the natural disappointment of not being accepted.
1. Rejection Hurts
You have invested a massive amount of time and effort to get to this point, so it is only natural to feel hurt on finding out that the college you wanted more than any other has not invited you to join them.
Do take time to absorb and process the information. Be kind to yourself by watching your favourite film or eat some wonderful comfort food.
Do put it into perspective, often the reason for an early application is to give yourself an advantage when applying to really competitive colleges or programmes. Colleges are not rejecting you for any personal reason or because you did something wrong, they are not offering you a place because they can’t accept everybody, remember that more than 95 people out of every 100 are rejected from the most prestigious colleges. You are in good company!
2. Change your mindset
You are no doubt familiar with the concept of a pro and con sheet, well it is a great way to deal with rejection!
Do sit down with a piece of paper and write a list of all the reasons why not getting into your choice of college is the worst thing that could have happened to you. On a second piece of paper write a letter to yourself from one year in the future telling yourself about your first months at your new college, wherever it may be. Then throw away the first list and keep the letter.
3. Time for Plan B
What is it that you want to achieve by going to that particular college? Is it really the only place that will enable you to achieve that goal? Very few people get through life without setbacks, but it is rarely the end of the story because there is never a single path to becoming who you will be.
Do remember that you have other options, great colleges full of wonderful people who want you to apply to them. You will have spent time finding out about them and there must have been good reasons why you put them on your list. In time, where you went will matter much less than the experience you gained by being there.
4. You’re not alone
It will be hard to hear from friends wanting to share the good news of being accepted into their college of choice, while you are grieving for the one that let you slip by. Don’t let yourself withdraw from family and friends, they will be the ones to offer support and comfort, helping you to get back on top once again.
Do talk to somebody you feel comfortable talking to. Experiences, both good and bad, are better when shared with somebody you are close to.